Our core needs are to be seen, heard, accepted and loved. As a child, we rely on our parents, teachers, friends and siblings to fulfil our needs. When these needs are not met, children can develop wounds like abandonment, rejection, betrayal, injustice.
Childhood trauma can rob us of confidence, security, safety, self worth, self confidence, and a sense of belonging. It forces us to tread carefully, to make ourselves invisible, to conform, to hide and to play small for fear of being rejected, abandoned, excluded or ending up being alone.
Trauma affects our subconscious mind, the nervous system and the energetic field all at once. Childhood trauma can seriously impair a healthy childhood development. It splits us off from ourselves; meaning, a part of us is still stuck at that age and carrying the pain of the trauma. At the point of overwhelm and shock, feelings got trapped in the nervous system, where they will reside unprocessed, unresolved and creates energy that becomes stagnant until healed and released.
Suppressing our emotions is a big problem because wounds are like magnets. They magnetically pull into themselves people and circumstances that will trigger the original wounding. The subconscious mind together with the soul are always working to become whole. So in order to put an end to the buried feelings and release them, they pull in circumstances that will help to recreate the traumatic feelings. As we become aware of these suppressed feelings, we can heal them so we don’t have to attract the same patterns.
Within most adults lives a terrified child who feels abandoned, rejected, unworthy, sad and lonely. These wounds were formed when they were a child and if the needs of the inner child are not addressed, they continue to live these wounds through the adult. The adult might have no idea of why they are feeling triggered, sad, or why they keep rejected potential partners, or why they can’t attract abundance in their lives.
This is why we have negative patterns that play out over and over. A pattern is buried energy seeking resolution, longing to be seen, recognised, acknowledged and healed. This is why when we get bullied at school as a child, lie often get bullied at work in adulthood. This also explains why we get into a relationship with one type of person, end it, and begin another with exactly the same type. These patterns end until we fully feel, heal and resolve them.
After nearly a decade of doing Inner child healing on my clients, I feel that it is such a beautiful gift to witness adults meeting their inner child for the first time. To witness them feel so many emotions that they had repressed for years. As their fears, guilt, shame, sadness, tears are felt and released, my clients feel safe, free, happy and empowered.